Sunday, July 20, 2008

...and here is the "linen closet"...

I hate clutter. I mean, I really hate it. And yet, I can't seem to get rid of it either. Here is a picture of my microscopic, I-want-to-be-a-closet-when-I-grow-up-but-am-really-the-laughing-stock-of-closets hall/linen closet. (Don't let the empty shelf fool you ~ it isn't always empty. That is where the bath towels belong if I ever actually get them all washed and put away.)

This closet is clearly the work of a man. No self-respecting woman would ever think about putting a 23" closet in the hall as the sole linen closet. If she did feel the need for such a small closet in the design, she would have 3 others lining the hallway, or incorporated into each bathroom. Since I don't have any other closets, I concluded with great certainty this is the work of a man's design; flawed from the word go.

Since this is the only hall closet, it has been the bane of my clutter delimma. Granted, I can close the door, and 94.7% of the time, I can ignore the mass chaos and confusion that lurks behind it. But when it comes time to go find something or put something away, I cringe. The wanna-be closet is home to everything from the bath towels to pillow cases to sunblock to medical supplies to nail polish to extra toothbrushes, and everything else that has no other home and David won't let me move to the garage. (He'll tell you that my answer to everything that needs to be put away-but I can't get rid of-but I don't want to see on a regular basis either, is the garage. It frustrates him to no end - - and it still usually ends up in the garage. But we aren't here today to discuss the garage. That is another post entirely.)

I know, I should go thru it and organize it, right? I have. Many times. And each time, I ask myself the same questions. What if some major catastrophe happens and I need (17) 6"x9" non-stick guaze pads? Or 8 rolls of medical tape to tape down said gauze pads? Or 2 pairs of scissors to cut the medical tape? {I obviously can't get rid of these life saving supplies.} What if I travel and need more than 7 make-up/toiletries bags? {I can't get rid of them ~ I'll need them at some point, and I don't want to have to go buy more...so I'm going to keep them "just in case."} What if I go camping and need a can of OFF in each hand, and one in each back pocket to ward off the droves of west-nile-carrying mosquitos that could be swarming me and my family? {Right, can't get rid of those either.}

So, my day was going along just fine until I did laundry this evening, and had to put beach towels away. It meant that I had to open the door to that pathetic excuse for a closet to stuff and shove towels to get them in there...and thus my sunny mood came to an abrupt and screeching halt and transformed into the why-do-we-have-so-much-crap mood that I am currently in. And now, here I sit, pounding away my frustrations because I opened up the dreaded hall closet door, and was reminded of the snarled mess that resides behind the tiniest closet door ever.

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